Bittersweet Nights
by BlueXBeanie
Summary: "I know. I know all too well that you're gone. But I don't want to believe that, because somewhere deep down I know you're still here." Italy waits for the arrival of Holy Rome one night. GerIta/HRE Germany theory. I write stories not summaries. Not sure what to rate, so I'll just go with T cuz I'm super paranoid.


**Guys, I still don't own Hetalia : ) **

**Summary: **_**I know. I know all too well that you're gone. But I don't want to believe that, because somewhere deep down I know you're still here.**_** Italy waits for the arrival of Holy Rome one night. GerIta/HRE=Germany theory.**

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I know. I know all too well that you're gone. But I don't want to believe that, because somewhere deep down I know you're still here. I know you'd never break your promise to see me again. So I've never stopped waiting, and I never plan on doing so. When I was still little, I'd sit outside Mr. Austria's house and wait for you to come home. Even though I don't live with him anymore, sometimes when I'm away from Germany's house, I'd go back to his house and wait. I'd stay up all night, hoping you'd come back. But in the end it's Germany that comes, concerned because he couldn't find me anywhere.

This is the second day straight I've gone without sleep, because I've been out here for two days. Part of the reason is because I got into a small fight with Germany, and the other part is because I felt like waiting for you all over again. I don't think anyone has noticed my disappearance. No one's found me yet, even though I'm in an obvious spot. Then again, they probably just think I need time to myself.

I'm cold. I knew I should've brought that blanket with me. What was I thinking, going outside into a cold winter night without a jacket on? I guess love makes people do crazy things. I wish you'd hurry up, this cold air isn't doing me any good. I wish you'd just come and wrap me up in that long, silly black cape of yours, even if it's torn up and bloodied from years of war.

The stars are pretty tonight, you know that? I'm pretty sure you do. I can see the Big Dipper, and I remember it because it's the first constellation you taught me. Germany taught me about the Big Dipper too, but I just pretended I had never known about it, just to humor him. I think you'd really like Germany, and be good friends. He reminds me of you. You and he are serious and awkward, easy to blush. You and he look the same, with the same blonde hair and blue eyes. You and he care for me too much than you should.

Yeah, you and Germany would be really good friends.

I can feel my hands becoming numb. I guess it really is cold. When I look down at my hands, I think about how much your hands would fit perfectly in mine when we were little. I bet they still do. When Germany holds my hand, I think about how much his hand remind me of yours.

How long have I been out here? I think it's about two in the morning. The black sky reminds me of your outfit.

My eyes feel heavy. I know I should be sleeping. God, I haven't even eaten anything in two days either. I've been busy waiting here. I bet you'd feed me a plate of potatoes like you used to do when I was hungry. Now I regret making you feel bad and insulting your food, but things always just slip from my mouth. You never insulted my food.

It's not so bad sitting out here and thinking about you. When I think of you, I feel like your right next to me. That doesn't make me feel too lonely.

Do you think I'm pathetic, sitting out here and desperately waiting for your arrival?

I'm sure you do. I don't think you'd be this lovesick if I were the one who went off to war. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and just beg you not to go, and just hold onto you and never let go. Would you have listened to me then? I bet not, but it's nice to imagine, right?

Right now, thinking of you, I'm not sure you'll ever come back. It seems the more I think about you the less likely chance I have of you coming back to me. But you wouldn't break a promise, right? Germany made a promise with me, and he never broke it. So since you guys are so alike, I guess it's safe to assume you wouldn't break a promise either right?

I know you'll come back to me soon. I don't care how long it takes; I know you'll come back.

I feel a small splash of cold water hit my arm, and then another one on my foot. I look up to the sky and wonder if it's raining, and sure enough it is. Dark storm clouds have gathered together, and the sky flashes with lightning. Rain starts pouring heavily, and soon I am drenched and wet and cold and I just want to go home but I know I can't. I promised I'd always wait for you.

Soon, I could feel a new type of water join in on my face. Much more warmer and it seems as if though it outnumbers the rain.

My hot and warm tears mix in with the rain that already soaked my face. Violent sobs rack my entire body, leaving me shaking and gasping for air. So this is love, huh? Love makes people crazy, and leaves them sobbing in the cold air on a winter night huh? Love is bittersweet.

Before I know it I'm holding my face in my hands and am gasping for air. My already wet hands get even more wet. I know I'm going to catch a cold by doing this.

Can't you just come home already? Do you see the things you make me do? Are you aware of how hurt I feel? You know I've never stopped thinking about you? Do you know that sometimes I hate you? Do you know that I wish you could just finally come home and sweep me up in your arms?

_Do you still love me?_

I'm too busy being a sobbing mess to notice a new presence right next to me. I can't even hear the thick German-accented voice whisper, "Italy."

I jump when I feel a strong and warm hand clasp my shoulder. I look up from my hands and my heart lurches and twists around, making my chest ache.

"Holy Rome..." I haven't said your name ever since you left. It feels nice to say it again, but it comes out as a whisper and my voice is hoarse. I knew you'd come back...

"...Holy Rome? I-It's Germany..."

My heart sinks and I'm sent back into my crying fit. I lurch myself foward at Germany's chest, sobbing into the black fabric. Out of all the things he could dress up in. Out of all the times he decides not to slick back his hair. Out of all the times to come...

Germany wraps an arm around me and holds me close, and I feel him bury his face into my wet hair. "I... I was worried. I've been looking for you... I was worried. Look Italy, I'm sorry. Please forgive me. All those things I said, I didn't mean them. I was just really stressed, and I'd hate to see you get hurt. I know, this is probably the worst time to say it but... I... Ich liebe dich..."

His voice was so soft, even softer at the last part. They way he talked reminded me of you. I sobbed even more, hugging Germany tighter. After a few minutes, I realized that by now I wasn't crying about you. I was crying about Germany, and how I hate that he reminds me of you.

Shakily, I pull that picture out of my pocket. It's you. But it's wet and drenched, just like me. I hold it up next to Germany's face. The look of surprise and confusion on his face reminds me of you, and it matches the picture perfectly. Smiling ever so slightly, I show it to him. It takes him a moment to register what he's seeing. Forgetting about the picture, I let it drop to the ground. I clench Germany's shirt and crash his lips down against mine. Germany wraps his arms around my waist and returns the kiss.

No, not Germany. Holy Rome. Yes, Holy Rome. But I guess Germany will have to do for now.

I pull away, and both of us are gasping for air. We have nothing to say. There is nothing to say. Our eyes speak for us. Germany pulls me into a small embarce and kisses my forehead.

"Let's go home..." he whispers. He grabs my hand starts leading me forward but stops abruptly. He turns around and bends down, picking something up from the dirt. He starts towards me again, and places something in my hand.

"You forgot this..."

I look down and see the picture of Holy Rome. I feel like crying all over again. I knew you still loved me. I knew I should've been waiting all this time.

I pull him down into one more kiss.

"Ti amo," I whisper against his lips. I love you my Holy Rome.

I knew you'd come back.

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**A/N:**

**Okay well, um... yeah. The end! :D I'm not sure what I was thinking when I made this. I got the idea when I was listening to the song Vanilla Twilight by Owl City. I considered making this into a one-shot about Italy missing Germany, then I considered Germany missing Italy. Then I went to Italy missing Holy Rome, and then it turned intoo this XD**

**I might edit this later, because some of these paragraphs turned into ramblings. Plus it's 2:45 AM, so I don't know what I'm doing. I haven't been able to sleep lately. (I think I may have insomnia since it's been going on for about 6 months now)**

**Oh, at the end I would've made Italy say "I love you my Holy Rome" in Italian but I don't speak Italian. Just Spanish and English. Sorry XD**

**Hope you liked it! Reviews are greatly appreciated~!**

**Ciao~! :D**


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